On getting older and not letting life pass you by

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My absence from the blog world of late hasn't probably been that surprising. I haven't blogged regularly in what seems like forever and my motivation to do so has been seriously lacking. And one of the main reasons for this? The fact that I feel I have nothing to write about, that nothing interesting, exciting or worthwhile ever happens to me. The other day I met up with some old friends who I hadn't seen for well over 2 months and they asked how I was and what was new. "Fine", I replied, "but you know me. Nothing really happens; it's just same old, same old." And the fact was I couldn't honestly think of anything to tell. There wasn't one thing of any importance that I could share. The others talked about home improvements, work, holidays, meeting new people. And then there was me, with my 'same old, same old'. I used to have so many dreams, plans and ambitions when I was younger, and now it's like I've just stopped dead where I am, watching the time and my life racing by, eager for something amazing to happen and stop me in my tracks. But it never does and I remain stuck in this vicious circle. The more I sit and do nothing, the less motivated I am to start doing something and the less motivated I am...well you get the picture!

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So I've come to a decision: I need to start living again. I need to shake off my sadness that my life hasn't turned out the way I hoped and make every day count. I need to stop waiting around for something wonderful to happen to me and start making my own happiness. I need to realise that I'm the one chiefly responsible for the way my life turns out and that others can only affect me as much as I let them.

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And how am I going to start doing this? Well, I'm starting by making the commitment to do more of what I know makes me happy long term. I know that I feel fulfilled when I spend time with the people I love. I know that being creative and expressing myself, be it through acting, singing, writing or baking, is something that I'll probably never tire of. I know that when I make the effort to take care of myself mentally, emotionally and physically, I feel so much better than when I neglect these aspects of my life. I know that I'm happier when my mind is stimulated, no matter whether it's through great conversation, reading a good book,   learning something new or even just watching something that really makes me think. I know that I always feel better when I make the effort to 'do', than when I just sit around all day and I know that procrastinating causes me endless stress and worry.

I'm also not going to shy away from making bigger decisions and living new dreams. I'll look into how I can develop my career and turn a job I don't really enjoy into a valuable learning experience, and a step on the way to my ultimate goal. I've always wanted to travel so will look into doing just that. I may be single and not  be be earning as much as I'd like, but there's still nothing to stop me. I'll start budgeting properly and saving so that one day, maybe sooner rather than later, I'll be able to afford my own place. All of these have so far been pipe dreams, but now's the time to start making them real. I might be scared and it might take me a while to put my plans into action but I need to try. Otherwise, I know I'll just end up looking back, cursing the missed opportunities and wishing, wishing, wishing that I'd done more. And that's something I'm not going to let happen.

And's that where I'm going to leave it for today. At least with my words anyway, because I do want to share this amazing manifesto which says it so much better and more succinctly than I ever could:

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'Til next time....

My Summer To Do List

Gone are the days when I used to have a summer break that lasted well over a month; as I'm not working in the education sector at the moment this is a privilege that I'm not currently entitled to. That doesn't mean I don't get holidays of course, just that I get fewer of them so that they seem extra precious when they do roll around. Luckily I'm currently at the start of a 2 week break from work and whilst I'm so looking forward to what it will bring, I'm also extra determined that I'm not going to let a single moment go to waste. With that in mind, I've created a summer to-do list full of all the things I want to achieve over the next couple of months. Some of the things will be more fun than others, but I feel that all of them will have a positive impact on me; mind, body or soul. There's no way I can get them all done in the space of a fortnight (when you see my list you'll understand!), but I can definitely give myself a head start before returning to work on 24th July   :-)

So without further ado, here's my list (starting from 01/07/12 with all items to be at least started by 01/09/12):

Summer To Do List

• Declutter my room (including my wardrobe) and donate as many unwanted items as I can to the charity shop
• Go on a shopping trip to fill in any gaps in my wardrobe (and maybe treat myself too!)
• Spend some time thinking about what my dream job would be (in terms of the skills I'd use/ my motivation for working) and searching for job opportunities that match well with this
• Declutter my email inboxes: delete all non-vital emails and unsubscribe from all my spam
• Get to know my city a little better by visiting new places and/or revisiting old ones with a fresh eye
• Spend some quality time with my family: maybe museum trips with Amy, bowling with all my siblings, DVD nights with my mum and sisters etc
• Be a better blogger: read and comment more on the blogs in my reader and post on a more regular basis
• Buy a Kindle (Purchased 07/07/2012)
• Read more frequently (either real or e-books)
• Get back into the baking habit by baking at least once a fortnight
• Be more active (Exercise for at least 30 minutes 5 times a week)
• Join the gym
• Snack more healthily (Eat chocolate and crisps 2/3 times a week only, and cut down on the amount of biscuits I eat as well as eating more fruit, nuts, cereal etc) and drink more water
• Stop putting off my dental and doctor's check ups and book the appointments!! (Both booked 09/07/2012)
• Stop biting my nails
• Book in at the hairdressers
• Give myself a DIY pedicure
• Exfoliate at least once a week
• Drink a Starbucks frappuccino
• Go for drinks in a beer garden/outside at a friend's
• Recreate my own version of last years Ben and Jerry's festival with friends

See what I mean when I said I wouldn't be able to get all this done in 2 weeks?! I'm really looking forward to making a good start though! And now I'm interested to know about your plans and goals for the summer. Have you made a to-do list? Have you got lots of goals that you want to accomplish or are you just planning on taking it easy? Let me know, you know I'd love to hear from you!

'Til next time...

A weekend round up

I thought I'd take a trip back in time tonight and write a weekend round up. In the early(ish) days of my blog, these featured on a semi-regular basis, but fast forward a couple of years and they're something that's long since fallen by the wayside. Granted, this may have quite a lot to do with the fact that I don't really do things at weekends any more but still...!

Friday
I finished work early (I was working an 8-4 shift), then headed home to get ready for a work summer party. Having not really socialised much with my work colleagues since I started my job in September and unsure who else was going, I was initially a little apprehensive about attending but when I discovered that I would know quite a few people there and that tickets were the bargain price of £1, I thought why the hell not! And I'm really glad I did! It was a night of discovering new favourite drinks and eating delicious buffet food. Of singing my heart out and playing the tambourine in a private karaoke booth. Of witnessing people doing things you never would have expected and seeing them in a whole new light. Of cheesy dancing, random singing and (semi) drunken conversations. Of the kind of fun I haven't had in a long time. It was much needed, and the sort of night I'll be making the effort to have lots more of in the future.

Saturday
I woke up about 9:30, had a leisurely breakfast of pancakes and syrup (a real favourite at the mo) and then got ready for work (one of the downsides of my job is that I have to work 2 Saturdays out of every 3). As it was Saturday, I allowed myself enough time to have lunch in Starbucks (I feel I should reward myself for working on weekends!) before making my way to work ready for my 1-9 shift. It wasn't fun. Not that working on a Saturday ever is, but yesterday was especially stressful. Basically over the last few days, the company I work for has suffered some serious problems with its IT systems, meaning that we currently have lots of unhappy customers. And while I really do sympathise with them, there's only so much unhappiness and stress a girl can take, especially when you've been dealing with much the same for the previous two days. But on the other hand, at least I was getting paid to deal with it! So I, along with my colleagues, sucked it up, tried to help as many people as we could and were all very relieved when 9 o'clock rolled around! Then I went home, had a light supper then crashed in front of the TV/computer for a couple of hours before heading to bed...that's as exciting as it got!

Sunday
I had a lazy morning (ate some breakfast, had a shower, got dressed, listened to the radio) and then headed to a rehearsal for my drama group's latest show which is coming up in less than two weeks! Eek! Even though they can be a bit stressful at times, especially when it's this close to the show, it's great getting together with all my friends, having fun on stage and watching all our hard work come together. After rehearsal, I walked home in the sunshine (a welcome sight after what seems like weeks of rain) and have spent a chilled out evening on the computer and half watching the football on TV. Come on England!!

And that was my weekend (although if we're being technical I suppose as I've booked tomorrow off work it hasn't finished just yet!) How was yours? Did you get up to anything fun or was it just more of the same old, same old variety? Drop me a line and let me know, as always I'd love to hear from you!

'Til next time...

Catching Up

And so there goes another month, seemingly in the blink of an eye. It's been another month of ups and downs for me; if you'd asked me around 10 days ago, I would have said that there had been more lows than highs, but I'm happy to say that, of late, things seem to have evened out a bit more :-)  How about having a look for yourself, as I present my month in a nutshell :

Highs

• Beautiful babies: On Easter Sunday, my friends L and G became parents for the first time and I was lucky enough to be able to visit them and their darling daughter a couple of weeks ago! Baby W is absolutely adorable and I can't wait for all the fun I'll have sharing in her first years of life :-)
• Being a winner: About 10 days ago, I was feeling really down. The weather was awful, I was off work but had nothing to do and I was feeling really isolated from all my friends. In an effort to pass some time, I decided to catch up on some of my favourite blogs and discovered that I had won a giveaway that the amazing Krysten of Why Girls Are Weird was hosting! I was so pleased that I immediately fired off a very excitable email to her in response and am now eagerly awaiting the arrival of my very own bohemian feather necklace from the very talented (and sweet) Hillery over at Clever Plumage. Look out for a reveal/review in the next couple of weeks! :-)
• Getting good news from work: Any regular readers of my blog might know that I'm not always the biggest fan of my job and that difficult customers and the sometimes monotonous nature of my work can sometimes get me down. However, over the last week or so, my experience has been something rather different. I had a really thought provoking meeting with my manager in which I received a lot of positive feedback, and also discovered that I'd qualified for our performance related bonus in the last quarter. As someone who often feels that I struggle in my current role, this was absolutely massive for me and gave me the confidence that I can achieve highly whilst I'm there. In addition, the meeting has also encouraged me to think about how I can make the most of my current skills and past experiences both in this job, and also when making my next career move. I'm inspired! :-)
• A special Saturday night out: Last Saturday evening I was transported back to late 19th Century Paris as three friends and I watched Phantom of the Opera at the beautiful Palace Theatre in Manchester. I don't know if it was the fabulous seats we had (literally only 4 rows from the stage!), the amazing performances or the incredible set and costume design, but I truly felt like I was sharing in the character's lives and experiences, rather than just watching a show. Definitely a must see!!
• 4 well needed days off: Having worked for the last few Saturdays in a row, I recently enjoyed a very much needed 4 day break. I finished work on Friday 4th and didn't have to be back in until Wednesday 9th! It was heaven, and I loved every second of it, especially catching up with some very dear friends over a DVD and Scene It on Sunday afternoon! :-)
• Easter: Extra time off work, lots of chocolate, an excuse to wear a pretty dress...these were just a few of the things I loved about Easter this year :-)

Lows

• My grandad's health: April as a month was one that was punctuated with hospital visits and worries about my Grandad. Although he's now 92, he has remained very mentally active and although much slower at walking than he used to be, he can generally get around with only a little help. However about 6 weeks ago, he had a series of falls over the space of 2 days and was admitted to hospital. The time he spent there was one of small steps forward and big leaps back. He would start having physio and seem to be making progress, but then it would be weekend or he'd pick up a bug, and by the time the physiotherapists were available again, it'd be back to square one :-(  About 10 days ago, he was finally moved to a local nursing home for some rehabilitation, and whilst he's much happier there (the hospital ward wasn't exactly the most cheery and social of places), he's still a long way from being his old self. Fingers crossed for some progress soon.
• Feeling isolated and lonely: Recently, I've had periods of feeling really lonely and isolated from many of my friends. As we're all getting older, more and more people I know have started to settle down and have children. Even one of my best friends who has been (mainly) single since who knows when is now all loved up with her new boyfriend. And whilst I'm happy for them, I've really begun to realise just how lonely I am. Gone are the impromptu nights out in town (granted they did stop a while back!) or even the girlie DVD nights, and in their place is Saturday night TV with the family and maybe the odd drink. Not that that's bad, it's just different and I'm not one that's great at dealing with change :-(
• More changes at work: As of Monday, I'll be on a new team at work as my current team manager is taking on a new role. Granted the rest of my team are moving with me, but I'll still have to settle into  a different team with colleagues I don't know well and a new manager whose leadership style I'll have to adapt to. Plus for some reason neither me nor my old manager can fathom, my change in teams has also completely screwed up my shift patterns. Since I started my job in September last year, my designated weekend day in work has always been a Saturday. Always. Meaning that if I have events on a Sunday, I've always been able to attend without booking a day's holiday. And I bet you know what's coming...my designated weekend day has somehow switched to Sunday. Which means that as things stand I won't be able to attend my friend's wedding, as it's on a Sunday and there are no holiday hours available. Fingers crossed that things get switched back as I've been promised, otherwise there'll be war!!
• Decidedly un-springlike weather: I seriously don't know what's up with this country. At the end of March the weather was absolutely glorious with clear blue skies and temperatures that rivalled any we'd expect to see in June. Since then, it's been simply shocking. We've had the coldest and wettest April since goodness knows when, and so far May isn't shaping up to be much better. Come back March, we miss you!

So there it is, and I hope you've enjoyed catching up with me as much as I've enjoyed catching up with all my favourite bloggers lately! How have the last few weeks been for you? Let me know, as always I'd love  to hear from you!

'Til next time...

What I've been loving this past month

A quick look at my blog tells me it's been exactly a month since my last post. And whilst part of me is kicking myself for not keeping my promises and posting sooner and with more regularity, there's another side which thinks it's especially fitting that I'm blogging today instead, especially as my post is concerned with all the things I've been loving over the last month or so. And here they are...

• Spring flowers...yes, I know it's a blogger cliché (well that's how it appears to me, at least) but I just love the beautiful blooms that are such a special feature of this time of year. From cherry and apple blossom to magnolias and daffodils...be still my beating heart!
• Beautiful spring weather...let's just ignore the fact that the past week has been mostly cold, grey and gloomy, shall we?! Seriously, the end of March in particular was glorious, with unbroken sunshine and temperatures that made it feel more like June. It really got me in a summery mood and made me think of holidays, fun and making plans for the months ahead.
• Soap and Glory "Clean on Me" and Herbal Essences "Tousle me Softly" shampoo and conditioner...three of my favourite products over the last few weeks, reviews will be coming soon!!
• Meeting new people and getting to know others better...whether it's an online acquaintance who I've finally got the opportunity to meet face to face, work colleagues who are becoming more and more like friends every day or saying hello to a friend's beautiful baby daughter for the first time, I've felt privileged to get to know every one :-)
• Lighter evenings and longer days...add the fact that we're getting ever closer to the longest day to the clocks moving forward to signal the start of British Summer Time, and what do you get? Days where it's light well before you reach work and night that doesn't fall until around 8 pm. Catching some daylight while you can is the best cure for the workday blues in my opinion, and I love the fact that I'll be able to get just that little bit more every day :-)
• Wearing dresses...whilst dresses have become a bigger and bigger part of my wardrobe over the past couple of years, it seems that my love of them has reached new heights this spring. They've formed an extensive part of my working wardrobe in recent weeks and every now and then, I find myself mentally adding new dresses to my spring/summer wishlist. Well a girl can dream...! :-)

So those are my loves of the last few weeks, but what about you? What have you been enjoying over the last month? Let me know, I'd love to hear from you! :-)

'Til next time...

What a week!!

Last Monday night, I sat down to blog. I spent a good hour or two selecting the perfect photos and choosing the words that expressed exactly what I wanted to say. When I thought everything looked perfect, I hit "publish" and then went to check my shiny new post out. And there and then realised that it was an utter disaster. Lines of text were layered on top of each other making my words a garbled mess that was impossible to read and the formatting of many of my pictures was just "off". And try as I might, I couldn't get it to look right. So finally, frustrated beyond belief, I gave up, saved my post as a draft and determined to come back to it the next day. But then life took over...

Last week was long, busy and stressful and definitely one that I was glad to see the back of come Sunday night. That isn't to say there weren't any good times, there always are, but last week was definitely dominated by the negative aspects; the major one being that last Thursday a member of my drama group, who I also considered to be a friend, lost her battle against cancer. This lady was one of the bravest, strongest and most inspiring women I had ever met and whilst we weren't especially close, I still feel her loss. It was an honour to have known her and I feel privileged to have shared a stage with such an amazing lady. I know that every performance of last week's show was for her.

Yes, that's right, we also performed our annual panto last week. With performances on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday nights and two shows on Saturday, things were certainly busy and made all the more emotional by the events described above. So when our 'director' (I use the term lightly) decided to create a huge fuss over nothing during the interval of the Saturday matinee, which caused people to break down in tears, it was pretty much the final straw. Whilst I don't like to criticise; I have never directed anything myself after all, it seems to me that she isn't really much of a director at all. She ignores half of the work we do at rehearsals, and very rarely has a positive comment to make when she is paying attention. She doesn't take anyone else's ideas onboard when making decisions and uses her position as head of the committee as an excuse to do whatever she likes. Her bossy and highly strung nature have made what is meant to be a fun way of spending your free time a task which needs to be endured. She said she was leaving after the last show, and to be honest, I think we'll all be happier now she isn't directing anything again for a while.

But in the midst of all this sadness, negativity and weariness (I was absolutely wiped out by Sunday), there was some good. We pulled together as a group, supported each other through the hard times, the sadness and confrontations and showed that if we work together, we can make it through. As I've said before, we're more than just people with a common interest, we're friends and it's never been more evident than this past week. And I know that, because of this, our future as a group is bright and we can look ahead with optimism. Bring on the next show!

 I also managed to find some happiness in the little things last week, which always helps, and this is something I'll be talking about in an upcoming post, so what I'd like to find out from you is what are the little things that make you smile? How do you pick yourself up when you're in a bad place? Let me know, as I'd love to hear from you! Also, if I get enough responses, I might share some of them so if you don't want this to happen, just make a note of this in your comment too.

'Til next time...

Wise Words for a Wednesday

So here's the deal: I really wanted to blog today but was finding it very difficult to decide on a topic. It felt too late to discuss last week's highs and lows, I didn't want to do a product review as I'd written a beauty based post last time and I scrapped my plans to revisit "What's in My Wardrobe Wednesday" partly due to the fact that I wanted to wait until after I'd been shopping again (just in case!) and partly because I really couldn't be bothered locating items and taking photographs. Shocking, I know! ;-) Then, whilst browsing Pinterest for inspiration, it hit me. Why not post some images from one of my boards? I toyed with a couple of them but eventually plumped for some of my favourite "Wise Words". And voilà! Hope you enjoy...

Source: rhonnadesigns.blogspot.com via Julie on Pinterest

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Source: Uploaded by user via Julie on Pinterest

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And there we have it! Hope there was something among these lovelies that had you mentally nodding your head in agreement or made you think just that little bit harder :-) And as usual, I'm also throwing the post over to you. Which are your favourite quotes? What's the piece of advice that you swear by? Please share, as I'd love to add a few more to my mental notebook!

'Til next time...
Julie

PS: And if you're a fellow pinner, feel free to follow me here. The more the merrier, I'd love to see what you're all pinning!